It’s been months (literally) since my last post. I could make some excuse about being busy, but I’d be lying. So I’ll tell you the truth.
And the truth is that I’m miserable.
Not just sad. Not homesick. Not having a bad day. I’m just miserable.
And a lot of things contribute to that. A lot of things that I can’t go into right now. But suffice to say, it’s hard to get up in the morning, hard to make it through the day, and hard to imagine doing the same thing the next day.
After taking a hard and truthful look at things (which isn’t at all easy), I’ve decided that I need some change. Some BIG change. And I’ve planned accordingly.
I will let everyone in on those changes soon. Until then, I keep pushing myself to go on to the next day
(Just to be clear – I’m not suicidal in any way. I’m just to that point where I don’t want to get out of bed. Depression? Possibly, but I know what to do to help make it better, and that little glimmer of change is what gets me through each day.)
In lighter news, I did something this weekend that DOES make me happy. I ran one of the obstacle course races I ran last year, the Super Spartan. I was horrendously out of shape for it, but I was going to do it nonetheless (I did pay for it, after all).
8 miles with 75 obstacles. Let’s just say, my legs were jello and I’m STILL finding bruises and scratches.
I hope everyone has had a better past couple months than me 🙂